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Horse Piss Spider

HORSE PISS SPIDER


It was evening. We were on the front porch, playing with the puppy. (We only had Mariposa then and she was tiny, no bigger than a minute, as small as a bug.) I’m on the built-in bench, she’s on the ground, Harry’s in the rocking chair. Idyllic, indeed. I reach for the puppy and spy what has to be the biggest freaking spider I’ve ever seen. As big as my fist. Bigger than a nightmare. All black and hairy and legs. Just sitting there, under Harry’s chair. I tell him, I grab the dog, he kills the spider. But I’ll never get that picture out of my head. How did it even get there, on the porch, without us seeing it? Without us HEARING it? ( I imagine it has to make a sound if it’s that size). The picture above is of it’s hole. Yes, one spider dug that hole. Its sting will make a horse piss. It can kill small things like puppies. So now, I pour boiling water down every single of these holes I see. A woman’s work is never done. Originally published February 25, 2012

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